Lumpy's day out.

I was in Boston today for my second consolation with the surgeon who is taking Lumpy out a week from Monday.

I have touched on Lumpy before on this blog but never really explained him.

He (because everything in my life has to have a name and personality; the car, the camera, the tumors...) is a benign Parotid Gland Tumor located at the end of my left jaw line below my ear lobe. He is about the size of a shooter marble or a slightly undersized golf ball (if there even is such a thing).

While the news of him being benign caused me great relief I am still focused on the surgery itself.

I am freaking!

First, I will be away from my daughter for at least 48 hours if not more, I am praying it will be less.

Second, I am going under. All the way out. While this has the bonus of not having to "hold really still" it also comes with violent vomiting upon waking up.

What fun.

Oh and third, the surgery carries a small and the surgeon says he doesn't anticipate a problem but he won't really know until he gets in there risk of paralysis on the left side of my face.

You see the facial nerve runs right through/on/beneath Lumpy.

So when the surgeon starts talking about minimal scarring and pain I could really give two craps.

I will take a scar. I will take pain.

I will even take the promised numbness of my left ear.

I just want to be able to smile normally when it is all over. I want to be able to close my eye just like I closed it the day before. I want to puff out my cheek and suck it back in again.


Normal.


With in reason of course.

I am after all. Me.