I, like many women, have a hard time communicating with my mother in law.
My Jewish mother in law.
She is a sweet darling woman. There is not a bad or evil bone in her body. She just happens to not listen to a word I say.
Spouse says it is because she talks and listens to me like I am one of her daughters.
This drives me crazy.
I say what I mean. I do not make a lot of fuss or use fancy words...I tell it like it is.
She interprets what I say in ways I could never have imagined.
Me: The sky is blue JMIL, it should be a nice day for a walk!
JMIL: OUI!!!!! Mervin had a kidney stone removed, how nice of you to offer to bring him a kugel.
Me: Ummm JMIL, I am very sorry for Mervin but I have no interest in bringing him a kugel.
JMIL: You want a kugel? I will make two then. Do you want some mundel bread to go with it? Bring some to your father, he loves my mundel bread. How is he feeling?
Me: Ummm JMIL No thank you, I do not wish to take any kugel or mundel bread. My father is the same thank you.
JMIL: teh teh teh, such a shame about your father. (shaking head and putting hand to forehead) You know what you should do? I will tell you what you should do...here is what I think you should do...You should get someone in! That is what you should do! Get someone. Do you think they would like some mundel bread too?
Me: No thank you JMIL, no mundel bread. We do not need to get someone in, my father manages.
JMIL: Mervin has some one in! Perhaps you can ask for a recommendation when you bring him the kugel....
Really this is how it goes. So when I say to JMIL..."JMIL, I will be in NJ this weekend and I would like to spend the morning and afternoon with you and JFIL so you can see the baby. I will be there around 9 and I will have to leave around 4. We can have lunch but not dinner, as I have plans."
This is what I get in return...."How wonderful!!! We can go shopping, have Spouse put the carriage in your car and JFIL can come too and help watch the baby. We can go to the mall, or the outlets. What would you like for dinner? I will go to Wegmans. Should I pick something special up or should we just make our own lunch and DINNER? I can make a kugel!"
What a weekend it will be!
Do you want to know how much? I will tell you how much...this is how much....
Now if Spouse reads this I am a dead woman....